The fear of Phobias.

There are certain things we hear about life, and we think to ourselves, or out loud to others, “there is no way this is a thing”. Our society, I suppose, has a genius gift of making completely unreal ideas and turning them into actual, tangible, phobias that can be treated and medicated. The word “phobia” has the tendency to take something stupid and make it into something real. Anablephobia, for example, is the fear of looking up. Or Aulophobia, which is my personal favorite, the fear of flutes. As I read through this phobia list, I have to ask myself, “Who decides this?” Is there a doctor out there whose soul purpose is create phobias? I had more faith in the field of science. I thought if a person came in complaining about a life-halting fear of flutes, a doctor would have them thrown into intensive therapy. I mean, don't get me wrong, flutes are scary things- they are long, and make uncommon sounds; but we probably shouldn't give this fear a name, or even talk about it to anyone.

On the other hand, the word “phobia” can also make something completely rational and instinctual and make you feel bad about it. It's not like anyone ever took pride in having a “phobia”. However, take Agraphobia, which is the fear of sexual abuse; is there really anyone out there that is NOT scared of being sexually assaulted? Name one person who hasn't been paralyzed with that fear at least once. It is in human nature to NOT want that. Apotemnophobia? The fear of amputations. Because normal people wouldn't mind being amputated one day, right? Another good one is Carcinophobia, which is the fear of cancer.

Now, what I want to know is, how does the fear of cancer and the fear of flutes get categorized equally? I have had many loved ones, many of which I share DNA, fight with cancer. It's a real thing to be scared of. If I was, someday, emotionally paralyzed by the fear of cancer, I would not want some 14 year old band-geek-dropout approaching me and explaining that he/she “understands what I am going through” because he/she “had a similar experience” when he/she “had to quit band because a new kid joined and played the flute”. Not the same thing. Yet, they are all called “phobias”. So, I have taken it upon myself to categorize this massive fear list into 3 sub-fear lists.

List 1: This list is for people who are not crazy at all. These “fears” should just be stricken from the “phobia” list and chalked up to human nature: abuse, death, illness, guns, clowns. Probably some others, but listing them is making me sad/scared/hate carnivals all over again.

List 2: This list of fears are for people that are, literally, insane. People with said fears should be asked to never speak of it again until it goes away:

flutes, looking up, gum, bright colors, air, beards, clothes, gravity.

Uhmm please let me know what you would do if you lived in your perfect airless, gravity-less, gum-less world.

List 3: Real fears. They paralyze some, they worry others, and others don't care at all:

driving, heights, snakes, loneliness, the unknown, insanity, sharks (or other animals), the ocean, natural disasters, needles, clowns, MTVs serious downward spiral, Grand Theft Auto (the last 2 I added myself because they are just as real as anything else).

I guess I, personally, have an undying fear of phobias that are being created to make everyone more stupid. 

Yours,

LD